Anand Karaj: what happens at a Sikh wedding, step by step

01

What the Anand Karaj means#

Anand means bliss and karaj means ceremony or event. Sikh teaching describes marriage as a spiritual union, with two people becoming 'one soul in two bodies', rather than only a contract between two families.

The ceremony usually takes place in a gurdwara, in the morning, with Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji present. Local practice differs, so the details below describe what is common rather than a fixed script.

02

The ceremony in order#

1. 01Guests gather in the darbar hall, bow before Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji and sit on the floor while kirtan is sung.
2. 02The couple sits in front of the Guru. The granthi or another Sikh leading the ceremony explains the meaning of marriage to them.
3. 03An Ardas (prayer) asks for blessings on the couple and their families.
4. 04In the palla ceremony, the bride's father places one end of the groom's scarf over his shoulder and the other in the bride's hand.
5. 05The first Laav is read from Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji, then sung while the couple walks clockwise around the Guru, holding the palla. They bow and sit.
6. 06The same happens for the second, third and fourth Laav.
7. 07The Anand Sahib is recited, a closing Ardas is offered and a Hukamnama (a verse read from the Guru) is shared.
8. 08Karah Parshad, a warm sweet offering, is served to everyone. Langar or a meal usually follows.

03

The four Laavan#

The Laavan are four hymns composed by Guru Ram Das Ji. They are often explained as four stages of a spiritual journey, which is also read as a picture of married life. Interpretations differ, and this is only a short summary.

First Laavਪਹਿਲੀ ਲਾਂਵ

Commitment to a righteous life and to following the Guru's teaching.

Second Laavਦੂਜੀ ਲਾਂਵ

Letting go of ego and fear, and growing in love and respect.

Third Laavਤੀਜੀ ਲਾਂਵ

Detachment from worldly pull, and longing for the divine in good company.

Fourth Laavਚੌਥੀ ਲਾਂਵ

Peace and union, where the couple's life is joined with the divine.

04

What guests should know#

• —Cover your head in the darbar hall. Gurdwaras usually have scarves if you forget one.
• —Remove your shoes before entering, and wear socks you don't mind showing.
• —Dress modestly. Long skirts or trousers make sitting on the floor much easier.
• —Bow or simply pause respectfully before Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji, then sit quietly. Men and women often sit on separate sides.
• —Never bring alcohol or tobacco onto gurdwara grounds.
• —Accept Karah Parshad with both hands cupped together. Ask for a small amount if you prefer.

05

What to ask your gurdwara early#

• —Which dates and times are available, and how long you have the hall.
• —Whether both partners need to be Sikh. The Sikh code of conduct is widely understood to expect this, and gurdwaras handle mixed-faith couples differently, so ask directly and early.
• —What is expected of the couple, including any dress or head-covering rules.
• —Who arranges the kirtan group, the Karah Parshad and the langar, and what donation is customary.
• —Who handles the legal side. In British Columbia, a marriage licence and a registered official are needed for the marriage to be legal, so confirm this with the gurdwara and BC Vital Statistics.

06

Inviting guests to an Anand Karaj#

Put the gurdwara's name, address and start time on the invitation, and say when guests should arrive. A short note about covering heads and removing shoes helps guests who haven't been to a gurdwara before. You can send one Ivory Gate invitation website with every function, map and RSVP on it, from CA$39, one-time.

Frequently asked questions#